multiple meaning

something must be something

too much noise

九月十日

我的大腦不讓我去想二姑媽過世的事情，一有要想起的念頭，就會立刻去想別的事情。很微妙。像是在想這樣微妙的事情也是一種避免去真正面對她已經消失的事實。

作了一個惡夢，醒來時全身冒汗。三個姐妹，兩人拿刀相對，我在中間阻止避免雙方受到傷害，但是第三人拿刀往我側腹刺入旋轉。我痛醒。時鐘顯示兩點半。

希望可以見到最後一面，大家都跟我說就像睡著了一樣。可是我沒辦法在腦中建立起二姑媽睡著的模樣，因為所有的照片都是醒著時候拍的。 所以無法連結，變得模糊，不真實。

好冷。

Synecdoche, New York again

After almost five years then I finally understand.




I'm just a little person
One person in a sea
Of many little people
Who are not aware of me

I do my little job
And live my little life
Eat my little meals
Miss my little kid and wife

And somewhere, maybe someday
Maybe somewhere far away
I'll find a second little person
Who will look at me and say

"I know you
You're the one I've waited for
Let's have some fun.

Life is precious every minute
And more precious with you in it
So let's have some fun

We'll take a road trip way out west
You're the one I like the best
I'm glad I've found you
Like hangin' 'round you
You're the one I like the best"

Somewhere, maybe someday
Maybe somewhere far away
Somewhere, maybe someday
Maybe somewhere far away
Somewhere, maybe someday
Maybe somewhere far away
I'll meet a second little person
And we'll go out and play

a man without tragedy is not allowed to be truly sad

you should not judge,
you should not compare,
you should not speak,
you should not


 cry.

I saw the old me behind the mirror

Her green plastic watering can 
For her fake Chinese rubber plant 
In the fake plastic earth 
That she bought from a rubber man 
In a town full of rubber plans 
To get rid of itself 

It wears her out, it wears her out 
It wears her out, it wears her out 

She lives with a broken man 
A cracked polystyrene man 
Who just crumbles and burns 
He used to do surgery 
For girls in the eighties 
But gravity always wins 

It wears him out, it wears him out 
It wears him out, it wears... 

She looks like the real thing 
She tastes like the real thing 
My fake plastic love 
But I can't help the feeling 
I could blow through the ceiling 
If I just turn and run 

And It wears me out, it wears me out 
It wears me out, it wears me out 

And If I could be who you wanted 
If I could be who you wanted all the time

departure

I don't know how to say goodbye.

I have problem

The color of my blood is black.

Friend request

" Could I add you as a friend on Facebook?"

膩了。

很多事情慢慢的不重要了。我似乎是守在這房間裡等待那時刻的到來。